I didn't realize just how much of a following I had on this site, until my posts became less frequent. Now I'm getting comments and emails (admittedly mostly from family) saying they hope I'm alright because they haven't seen me post in a few day! Ha! Well, thank you, one and all, for your concern.
I'm happy to say, though, that I'm just fine, and I haven't posted much recently simply because there hasn't been that much for me to write about.
I have this week off, and then next week must administer my finals (all on the same day...yippee) before I officially get my break.
For my break, it's looking like I'll be traveling with Aaron and one of his students up to Nanjing, Hangzhou, and potentially Shanghai... and yes, mom, if we get up there I'll be sure to give Ed a ring. We're now in the "how do we actually get up there" phase of planning. Fortunately, the Chinese do not operate on a future-looking mindset, so even though it seems like we're planning at the last minute, we're really doing just fine. All we need to do is avoid traveling on the Chinese New Year holiday.
So what am I doing with my time? Not too much. Going out on occasion, and meeting up with friends, but primarily just staying in, catching up on sleep, et al. I'm EXTREMELY happy to report that as of yesterday I have a brand new, coil-spring matress! No longer am I sleeping on a straw mat! Woot! And even better, the school paid for and delivered it! Granted, it's no Seely Posturepedic, or anything... but there's a marked improvement. I woke up this morning and wasn't near-paralyzed in my lower back.
My lovely Jienan is safe in New York, and I'm hoping to get her on Skype, sooner rather than later.
Other than that, not much else to say. I'm glad you all seemed to have such nice Christmases (snow GALORE!). I'll be bringing my gifts backs stateside over the summer, so don't fret! I just didn't want to deal with the monumental headache of the Chinese postal system.
I think they'd have better luck with carrier pigeons than with half the shady, stupid, ignorant semi-humans they hire... not that I've developed a bias, or anything...
Until next time.
(CS)WC Out.
The lycanthropic jottings of my fourth year prowling the Chinese moonlight.
Sunday, December 28, 2008
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
圣诞快乐 To All, And To All A Good Night!
I was scheduled to teach today - Christmas Eve - because in China, they've got a word for Christmas:
Thursday.
(Note: Their actual word for Christmas is 圣诞节 [shengdanjie])
My 3 Freshmen writing classes arrived, as usual, ready to buckle down and - in the vernacular of my little sister - "Do Work." But, being as it was the last class of the semester, and I was in the holiday spirit (read: lazy, tired, at-wits'-end), I opted to show them a movie... don't worry, kids, we've already reviewed extensively for the final.
Alas, I've misplaced my copy of The Muppet Christmas Carol - and so was forced to revert to an alternate choice. Out of both respect for my (few) male students' pride, as well as my own, my other Christmas-y movie: Love Actually, was completely out of the question. What, then, would foot the bill....?
I'd read last night that the Chinese government was preparing a pair of its Destroyer battleships (A-12, Hit!) to set sail for the Gulf of Aden, and join the ever-expanding international task force amassing there to "Do Glorious Battle" with the Somalian pirates lurking there. With this in mind, I opted for the clear choice:
Pirates of the Caribbean, of course! What could be better than a movie glorifying piracy for a country preparing to combat foreign piracy while acting as a shelter for, arguably, the largest source of information and technological piracy in the world?? Even after 5 months here, the irony is still not lost on me...
* * *
Nancy's officially gone. Blah. And yes, it sucks. She flew out for New York at the ass-crack of dawn on Tuesday, and I've yet to hear from her.... of course, the enormous flight time and time differential, coupled with communication difficulties (damn the SIM cards), it's not surprising. Just depressing.
I'm making my pell-mell plans for the holiday now. There's the possibility I could hitch up with Aaron - though his plans seem fairly... unformed, as well, which is discouraging. Nancy tried to pawn me off on some of our mutual friends with travel plans. One couple in particular is planning on going to Thailand (which I've always thought of as a place to go if you were single), and she was tell my sob-story to them before I cut in and said "no thanks." They were willing to let me come with them.... but I don't think anyone would begrudge me not wanting to me the awkward, last minute, quasi-unwanted third-wheel on anyone's travel arangements. In all likelyhood, I'll get up to Hangzhou, and perhaps Shanghai and/or Nanjing. None of that sounds particularly appealing, though... go figure.
The night before she left, Nancy and I went to the Taj Mahal retaurant a few blocks away and had a semi-impromptu early Christmas. She had bought me a bottle of nice cologne, and an enormous stuffed bear ("to take her place while she was gone"). I brought along a 2 page letter from me, and a pair of small stuffed monkeys I found at a toy shop. One monkey for me, and one for her in NYC. She liked it :)
And yes, the bear is very cuddly to sleep next to. Doesn't generate near the body heat, though... so I'm afraid it'll have to be a short-term affair.
(CS)WC Out.
Thursday.
(Note: Their actual word for Christmas is 圣诞节 [shengdanjie])
My 3 Freshmen writing classes arrived, as usual, ready to buckle down and - in the vernacular of my little sister - "Do Work." But, being as it was the last class of the semester, and I was in the holiday spirit (read: lazy, tired, at-wits'-end), I opted to show them a movie... don't worry, kids, we've already reviewed extensively for the final.
Alas, I've misplaced my copy of The Muppet Christmas Carol - and so was forced to revert to an alternate choice. Out of both respect for my (few) male students' pride, as well as my own, my other Christmas-y movie: Love Actually, was completely out of the question. What, then, would foot the bill....?
I'd read last night that the Chinese government was preparing a pair of its Destroyer battleships (A-12, Hit!) to set sail for the Gulf of Aden, and join the ever-expanding international task force amassing there to "Do Glorious Battle" with the Somalian pirates lurking there. With this in mind, I opted for the clear choice:
Pirates of the Caribbean, of course! What could be better than a movie glorifying piracy for a country preparing to combat foreign piracy while acting as a shelter for, arguably, the largest source of information and technological piracy in the world?? Even after 5 months here, the irony is still not lost on me...
* * *
Nancy's officially gone. Blah. And yes, it sucks. She flew out for New York at the ass-crack of dawn on Tuesday, and I've yet to hear from her.... of course, the enormous flight time and time differential, coupled with communication difficulties (damn the SIM cards), it's not surprising. Just depressing.
I'm making my pell-mell plans for the holiday now. There's the possibility I could hitch up with Aaron - though his plans seem fairly... unformed, as well, which is discouraging. Nancy tried to pawn me off on some of our mutual friends with travel plans. One couple in particular is planning on going to Thailand (which I've always thought of as a place to go if you were single), and she was tell my sob-story to them before I cut in and said "no thanks." They were willing to let me come with them.... but I don't think anyone would begrudge me not wanting to me the awkward, last minute, quasi-unwanted third-wheel on anyone's travel arangements. In all likelyhood, I'll get up to Hangzhou, and perhaps Shanghai and/or Nanjing. None of that sounds particularly appealing, though... go figure.
The night before she left, Nancy and I went to the Taj Mahal retaurant a few blocks away and had a semi-impromptu early Christmas. She had bought me a bottle of nice cologne, and an enormous stuffed bear ("to take her place while she was gone"). I brought along a 2 page letter from me, and a pair of small stuffed monkeys I found at a toy shop. One monkey for me, and one for her in NYC. She liked it :)
And yes, the bear is very cuddly to sleep next to. Doesn't generate near the body heat, though... so I'm afraid it'll have to be a short-term affair.
(CS)WC Out.
Saturday, December 20, 2008
Deeply Disappointed
I'd been planning on spending the holidays with Nancy. I bought a little christmas tree to put presents under, had new years plans, and we'd also been planning to travel together on the month-long holiday from school I get in January. Add to that her birthday in the middle of January, and mine toward the end. It was set to be a busy, very enjoyable month.
Now it looks very much like the Hindenburg, post-ill-advised cigarette break.
Last night, Nancy was called home by her brother, because her uncle needed to talk to her. She was told, apparently, that his company had shipped some products to the USA, and now the buyer was unwilling to pay due to some quality issue (go figure, right?). The issue needed to be resolved immediately and, since this uncle doesn't speak a lick of English, has turned in desperation to one Ms. Nancy Sun to act as his traveling interpreter for the next.... oh..... month.
It's not her fault. She's pretty upset about it too. And since I realize this, I'm trying to put my "it's OK" face on, and suck it up so she doesn't feel any worse about it.
But, really, it's not OK.
A month, away, leaving me here in Wenzhou with extremely limited options for ... pretty much anything. Christmas? I'm back to "Santa" buying himself a bottle of liquor. New Years? Why bother? Travel? I may still be able to get up to Nanjing, but pretty much anything else is out of the question now. I have little, if any, desire at current to go places by myself, nevermind the extreme - nigh, impossible - difficulty of doing so without a translator. Her birthday? Kaput. Probably mine too.
Whoop de doo.
This is certainly a trial for her and I to go through. I don't know... I just don't know. I'm not mad at her, just very sad, very disappointed in the situation.
I'm not going to sit around and mope the whole time. That will accomplish nothing but making me more bitter at her about this. And yes, there is bitterness. She had to choose between work and me. She chose work. Can I be mad about that? No. It was for family and an emergency. But it's still a hard pill to swallow.
The strange thing is, before she flies out on Monday, she wants to spend lots of time with me... I, on the other hand, would rather be left alone. In spite of myself, I've found I've retreated away from her, emotionally... most likely out of self-preservation. This, I know, may exacerbate the situation - it makes me look like a cold, unfeeling jerk - but it's the only thing I think I can do right now: hold myself together.
I don't know what this means for her and I... but I don't like the feeling I have about it. I hate long distance things. Even temporary ones. I'd gone out of my way to avoid yet another doomed-to-failure scenario, and yet... here I am, exactly where I hoped to never be again.
Damn.
Now it looks very much like the Hindenburg, post-ill-advised cigarette break.
Last night, Nancy was called home by her brother, because her uncle needed to talk to her. She was told, apparently, that his company had shipped some products to the USA, and now the buyer was unwilling to pay due to some quality issue (go figure, right?). The issue needed to be resolved immediately and, since this uncle doesn't speak a lick of English, has turned in desperation to one Ms. Nancy Sun to act as his traveling interpreter for the next.... oh..... month.
It's not her fault. She's pretty upset about it too. And since I realize this, I'm trying to put my "it's OK" face on, and suck it up so she doesn't feel any worse about it.
But, really, it's not OK.
A month, away, leaving me here in Wenzhou with extremely limited options for ... pretty much anything. Christmas? I'm back to "Santa" buying himself a bottle of liquor. New Years? Why bother? Travel? I may still be able to get up to Nanjing, but pretty much anything else is out of the question now. I have little, if any, desire at current to go places by myself, nevermind the extreme - nigh, impossible - difficulty of doing so without a translator. Her birthday? Kaput. Probably mine too.
Whoop de doo.
This is certainly a trial for her and I to go through. I don't know... I just don't know. I'm not mad at her, just very sad, very disappointed in the situation.
I'm not going to sit around and mope the whole time. That will accomplish nothing but making me more bitter at her about this. And yes, there is bitterness. She had to choose between work and me. She chose work. Can I be mad about that? No. It was for family and an emergency. But it's still a hard pill to swallow.
The strange thing is, before she flies out on Monday, she wants to spend lots of time with me... I, on the other hand, would rather be left alone. In spite of myself, I've found I've retreated away from her, emotionally... most likely out of self-preservation. This, I know, may exacerbate the situation - it makes me look like a cold, unfeeling jerk - but it's the only thing I think I can do right now: hold myself together.
I don't know what this means for her and I... but I don't like the feeling I have about it. I hate long distance things. Even temporary ones. I'd gone out of my way to avoid yet another doomed-to-failure scenario, and yet... here I am, exactly where I hoped to never be again.
Damn.
Sunday, December 7, 2008
On holidays, next semester, and what lies beyond
It's rare here in Wenzhou that I really get (or take) the opportunity to say "time out" and think about what I'm going to do *next.* This is, obviously, because my job keeps me pretty busy (I'm running a homework deficit right now), and really, in my offtime, do I really really want to be contemplating my future? I'd rather write a blog, or play video games. But the question itself looms larger and larger with each passing day. I just realized last week that in less than a month, my stay here in China will be 1/2 over.....
What about after?
Certainly I have my options. It falls, ultimately, between returning home and staying on another year - either at the Medical College, or (more likely) another school/place entirely. Let's go over the options, shall we?
1. Stay in China
Following the summer return home (of course), there is the admittedly-tempting option to return to the PRC and continue teaching. Certainly I've met many people who've made precisely that decision. And it certainly does have its perks. We live, for lack of a better term, like kings here. What I am paid if far beyond what most people in China make. I can live extremely comfortably, and still actually save money. And here's the rub: every other foreigner I know working at a private school makes considerably more money than I do, all the while doing less actual work. All-too-often I'm given looks of amazement and pity when I disclose over a bar drink to a new friend that, yes, I am expected to give and grade homework.
There is also the girl factor. This, as anyone who knows me well, well-knows, often throws me for a loop in decision-making. Why would I want to leave a place where the girls are literally lining up to go out with me... attractive girls, at that. Chalk it up to, I dunno, maybe more maturity, though... but that particular allure doesn't seem to be holding nearly as much weight as it once did. Even factoring in current g/f... does that make me cold? hard? shallow? ... I don't think so.
2. Return to the U.S.
Option number 2 also has its share of allure. This, of course, was the de facto plan upon arriving here in lovely Wenzhou. Stay a year, GTFO. Go back to the states, and sit myself firmly back in the desk labelled "student." (A much more familiar position for me!) This option, despite the economic convulsions the world has been facing, has lost little of its lustre. I said (only 1/2 joking) that if McCain won the election, I was going to stay in China for at least 4 years. Well, he didn't. A man I truly believe in will be firmly planted in the White House by the time I set foot on U.S. soil again, making any possibility of returning all the more alluring. I've begun looking at schools with grad programs applicable to my areas of interest (haven't decided if I should be looking at education programs, history programs, or some other mysterious "door #3" program yet), and I find my appetite for continued learning once again whetted.
And despite my coninual (and completely sincere) adulation of the life I'm leading here, the people I'm meeting, and the job I'm doing... all that silver lining doesn't cover up the shit I see on a daily basis. China's developing, and developing rapidly (almostly dangerously fast, some might say)... but that doesn't change the fact that its still largely a 3rd world country full of ignorant, rude people living in shit-shacks, controlled by a government who tolerates as little dissent or free thought as its can manage in an era of Internet (I have to run many websites - even perfectly legitimate ones - through "proxy" servers which mask my location and identity so I can A. actually view the pages and B. not get arrested for it).
And despite the fact that I really like the people I meet here - they all offer completely unique and interesting perspectives on the world - there's something about the vast majority of them (I'm talking about the permanant residents, overwhelmingly) that strikes me as off... an example I wish of avoid following: many of them seem to be running from their lives. You read the correctly. China and its ilk (East-Asian, developing nations with a rabid desire for English teachers at all levels), offer this amazing safe-harbor for people simply unable to cope with the pressures and, yes, difficulties of the so-called "real world." As I said before, we live like kings here... and I'm the smallest king, doing the most work. I do not mind this. I consider it a learning experience; a chance to get some live-fire training in a potential carreer path. But if I wanted to - as several others have outright told me they're doing - simply avoid bacome a functional member of society ad infinitum, this is definitely the place to do it. Many private schools require that you basically show up, and you've done your job.... and you get paid ludicrously to do so. I'm making 5500 RMB/month, with no taxes. Though this converts to a mere ~$800/month if you do a direct exchange, it spends more like $3000 here. I have no living costs, so it's all gravy, too. And, I'll state once again, I'm at the very low end of the payment totem pole. Had I no aspirations other than living comfortably, why ever leave? I am paid simply because I am white. That's the end-all-be-all of it. I have this job, this pay, this life, because of the color of my skin, the language I naturally speak, and the country I am from. And that, in contrast to many others, is actually a reason for me not to stay.
If nothing else, this experience here has taught me that I do, in fact, have pretty high goals for myself. I may not always be able to spell them out, or define them... but I see myself a more than just someone paid to be a white English speaker.
Well, I guess the title was somewhat misleading. I'll get around to the holidys next time.
Sincerely Yours,
I Am,
(CS)WC Out.
What about after?
Certainly I have my options. It falls, ultimately, between returning home and staying on another year - either at the Medical College, or (more likely) another school/place entirely. Let's go over the options, shall we?
1. Stay in China
Following the summer return home (of course), there is the admittedly-tempting option to return to the PRC and continue teaching. Certainly I've met many people who've made precisely that decision. And it certainly does have its perks. We live, for lack of a better term, like kings here. What I am paid if far beyond what most people in China make. I can live extremely comfortably, and still actually save money. And here's the rub: every other foreigner I know working at a private school makes considerably more money than I do, all the while doing less actual work. All-too-often I'm given looks of amazement and pity when I disclose over a bar drink to a new friend that, yes, I am expected to give and grade homework.
There is also the girl factor. This, as anyone who knows me well, well-knows, often throws me for a loop in decision-making. Why would I want to leave a place where the girls are literally lining up to go out with me... attractive girls, at that. Chalk it up to, I dunno, maybe more maturity, though... but that particular allure doesn't seem to be holding nearly as much weight as it once did. Even factoring in current g/f... does that make me cold? hard? shallow? ... I don't think so.
2. Return to the U.S.
Option number 2 also has its share of allure. This, of course, was the de facto plan upon arriving here in lovely Wenzhou. Stay a year, GTFO. Go back to the states, and sit myself firmly back in the desk labelled "student." (A much more familiar position for me!) This option, despite the economic convulsions the world has been facing, has lost little of its lustre. I said (only 1/2 joking) that if McCain won the election, I was going to stay in China for at least 4 years. Well, he didn't. A man I truly believe in will be firmly planted in the White House by the time I set foot on U.S. soil again, making any possibility of returning all the more alluring. I've begun looking at schools with grad programs applicable to my areas of interest (haven't decided if I should be looking at education programs, history programs, or some other mysterious "door #3" program yet), and I find my appetite for continued learning once again whetted.
And despite my coninual (and completely sincere) adulation of the life I'm leading here, the people I'm meeting, and the job I'm doing... all that silver lining doesn't cover up the shit I see on a daily basis. China's developing, and developing rapidly (almostly dangerously fast, some might say)... but that doesn't change the fact that its still largely a 3rd world country full of ignorant, rude people living in shit-shacks, controlled by a government who tolerates as little dissent or free thought as its can manage in an era of Internet (I have to run many websites - even perfectly legitimate ones - through "proxy" servers which mask my location and identity so I can A. actually view the pages and B. not get arrested for it).
And despite the fact that I really like the people I meet here - they all offer completely unique and interesting perspectives on the world - there's something about the vast majority of them (I'm talking about the permanant residents, overwhelmingly) that strikes me as off... an example I wish of avoid following: many of them seem to be running from their lives. You read the correctly. China and its ilk (East-Asian, developing nations with a rabid desire for English teachers at all levels), offer this amazing safe-harbor for people simply unable to cope with the pressures and, yes, difficulties of the so-called "real world." As I said before, we live like kings here... and I'm the smallest king, doing the most work. I do not mind this. I consider it a learning experience; a chance to get some live-fire training in a potential carreer path. But if I wanted to - as several others have outright told me they're doing - simply avoid bacome a functional member of society ad infinitum, this is definitely the place to do it. Many private schools require that you basically show up, and you've done your job.... and you get paid ludicrously to do so. I'm making 5500 RMB/month, with no taxes. Though this converts to a mere ~$800/month if you do a direct exchange, it spends more like $3000 here. I have no living costs, so it's all gravy, too. And, I'll state once again, I'm at the very low end of the payment totem pole. Had I no aspirations other than living comfortably, why ever leave? I am paid simply because I am white. That's the end-all-be-all of it. I have this job, this pay, this life, because of the color of my skin, the language I naturally speak, and the country I am from. And that, in contrast to many others, is actually a reason for me not to stay.
If nothing else, this experience here has taught me that I do, in fact, have pretty high goals for myself. I may not always be able to spell them out, or define them... but I see myself a more than just someone paid to be a white English speaker.
Well, I guess the title was somewhat misleading. I'll get around to the holidys next time.
Sincerely Yours,
I Am,
(CS)WC Out.
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