Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Antepenultimate

So the title's slightly misleading - I doubt this will be the third-to-last entry before I wing it on back to the states - but the sentiment holds true. It's beginning to dawn on me that year-1 here is all but over. Today I finished what turned out to be my last day of "class"... a happy fact that I only learned yesterday. You see, next week is actually a "makeup" week for the occasional single-day holidays (festivals) through the course of the semester. That's right, they don't even let us have "real" breaks. We just have to make them up at the end. I'm not sure if I should blae the govt. or (more likely) the school itself. Silly pinkos...

Regarding the scheduling catastophuck, it's been resolved... though not entirely in the way either of us want it. After my phone tirade, Xiaoxian did in fact manage to find an open slot on the 14th instead of the 17th of June, and told me as much. Knowing that this was basically as good as it was going to get, I readily assented and began preparing to tell my classes of the coming schedule change.

And then she kept talking...

She then said that I actually did not have class next Tuesday, since we'd never missed a Tuesday (remember it's makeup week), and I only had classes on Monday and Thursday. Thus, the entirety of her argument against me giving some of my finals next Tuesday was, in fact, utterly false. I've completed my 32 Tuesday hours/class.

Of course, I didn't make the same mistake as last time. I kept my mouth shut, and simply nodded my head this go-round. But it will turn out fine. I'm doing exactly 1/2 of my total finals next week, and the 2nd half between the 10th and 14th. And I'm thinking that will work out great. The school's happy because - to the untrained eye - I'm doing exactly what they want: giving finals on the days they set forth. But I'm happy because they're not completely backloaded, and so I have a good shot of getting out of here on time! Woohoo!

I showed my listening classes The Daily Show today... and let's just say it doesn't translate that well. Not that I care. It was a new episode for me, and it's in English, and hey, it's GOT to be more entertaining that listening to Special English (where...people...speak...like...this...so...foreigners....can....understand...).

Next week my speaking sophomores will present their 5 minute finals, in which they will attempt to be "the teacher" and teach me a skill. I'm hoping - and expecting - that it will be very entertaining. Xiaoxian, as usual, voiced some "concerns" over this method of non-test-testing, but I replied that the purpose was not to stump the kids, but to adequately measure their oral English improvement over the course of the semester. How would a paper test do that? And, as I discovered last semester, the students find these things easy, and even fun to do. It's all the utility of a test, without the dullness and painfulness. I know. I did them in college a lot... especially in polysci. I find I model myself quite a bit off of a polysci prof I had: Jules Boykoff. He was a really good teacher, and really cool to boot.

See You Next Time, Space Cowboy,
(CS)WC Out.

let's open the blinds

Saturday, May 23, 2009

The Net-Nanny

The innocuous, almost child-like sounding name of the much more insidious wall of blocks and bans that China uses to forcibly censor what its people can and cannot see on the web: The Net-Nanny. It goes by another name from many of its detractors - both Chinese and foreign: The Great FireWall (GFW). It is the system put into place by the Communist regime which moniters and "harmonizes" China's internet by banning sites and content they deem subversive, potentially-subversive, humiliating, or just bad press for their government.

Common targets are: Wikipedia, Western media outlets, blog sites, YouTube, occasionally Facebook, and many of the other sites across the Great Series of Tubes that make the internet actually useful and fun. As usual with China, the results are haphazard at best. Often entire sites are blocked out for months at a time (currently, YouTube) because of a single item (in this case, a video of Chinese police savagely beating Tibetan protesters) which could - according to the govt - cause unrest or disharmony.

The sad irony to this is two-fold:
1) by using such a draconian method of censorship, the Chinese are using the proverbial hatchet to remove a fly from their forehead. In blocking YouTube for having this video, the Chinese Govt. unwittingly alerted many, many people worldwide to the existence of the video. The damage they were trying to prevent to their reputation is therefore doubly done, both by the initial "item in question," and by the inevitable firestorm of their blatant lying and censorship to cover it up. Cock gun, aim at foot, fire.

2) The GFW is notoriously... well, STUPID. It will block one site which is considered subversive, but miss a whole host of others which, really, have more potential damage to do harm. Back to the ongoing YouTube incident, the site is still down, but the event (the 50th anniversary of the failed uprising of Tibet against the Communists) is now months behind us. The continued blocking only serves to remind everyone again and again just what an oppressive tact the government is forcing down their throats.

Currently, we're coming up on two big events in China's history: the first is the 60th anniversary of the birth of the PRC, so this leads the govt. to want to make the internet as "clean" and "harmonious" as it can. The second is the 20th anniversary of the June 4th Incident (aka the 1989 Tiananmen Square Student Massacre), an event which the CCP continues to deny to this day. So of course, the GFW has gone batshit crazy as of late.

The latest victims? Blogs. As of now, my blog site (and many, many other blogging services) cannot be accessed all in Mainland China... through normal means. You may be asking: how then am I still posting? Good question...

The internet was created, and is still fundamentally made up of people who, quite frankly, don't want Big Brother peering over everything they do. It is designed to subvert authority and disseminate knowledge freely and unfettered. The Chinese Govt. obviously did not - and still does not - fully realize the can of worms it was opening by allowing the internet into their country at all. There are things called "proxys" which befuddle websites IP addresses. For those of you not "in the know," an IP address is exactly what is sounds like. It's the "place" on the web when a particular page or user can be found. Censors like the GFW, as well as any other tracking service, such as Google, et al, function by looking up IP addresses and then... doing whatever they are designed to do with them.

A proxy makes the Net Nanny think that the site I'm viewing is some other site in Wisconsin, Bermuda, Cincinnati, London, Moscow... wherever.... by routing the IP address through itself before sending it to me. Voila, clean slate. Untrackable. Unblockable. It's different ever time you use it, so there's no way to simply anticipate and thwart it, as a government.

my current proxy is called zendlife... and it's quite nice. I'm liking it a lot, so far :D

This ongoing farce of "control over the internet" makes me shake my head, though. And I'm not the only one by a long shot. Even the Chinese shake their heads at it (except that media whore Jackie Chan, who agree with the government that the Chinese people are effectively children and need "to be controlled"). It's enough to make one wonder how long this tangled inter-web of misinformation, lies, deceit, and blocks will hold up to the scrutiny and disdain of not just the outside world, but the Chinese people themselves...

(CS)WC Out.


The sleet rain on the slate roof

Update from Bureaucratic Hell

Title: Update from Bureaucratic Hell

OK, fine, not exactly... it's at the very least giving me a headache and making me a bit piqued in the face, though. I'll start at the beginning...

Several weeks ago... not exactly sure... my "nanny" Xiaoxian came into our office and presented us with the finals schedule, which - as expected - had been made with absolutely no consultation from any of us. As it was, I was scheduled to give my last tests on June 17th, one of the last days of the finals. Thinking that the schedule was, well, set, I didn't raise a fuss over it, and simply began planning how I could still adhere to my own departure schedule. The answer presented itself in recalling what some of my own professors have done from time to time: simply move the final test to the last day of class... in this case, June 2nd and 4th.

I brought it up with each and every class of students: "are there any objections, any schedule conflicts, to us moving the test to the last day of class? If you don't want to bring them up now, you can talk to me after class in private." Not only did no one raise any objections... as I suspected, they were all rather happy at the idea of simply getting a test over with sooner. I know from personal experience, that finals week tends to be hellacious for students, and that moving a test to earlier is actually a great relief.

So it seemed set, and I was on my way to departing by the 20th, as I'd hoped to. And here's where the big mistake was made: when sending in my 2 versions of the test (to curb cheating, as suggested by my professor father), I made mention of my schedule change to Xiaoxian, simply to clarify that I'd need both test versions back at the same time. The next day, she called me...

- I'd like to stop here for a moment and go on a minor tangent, if I may. I have nothing personally against Xiaoxian. I know her job is hard, and thankless, and I try try try to keep that in mind at all times. But the only times I ever see her are when I've done something "wrong." Ever. She starts in with this fake, forced-sounding into of "Hi, how are you doing today?" kind of thing, and before I can even really answer she's into her whole, "well you're doing this wrong..." bit. Last week I saw her and she said she "missed me"... but she never wants to find me unless it's to chide me about something. Is it any wonder, then, that I go out of my way to avoid her? That I regard her in many ways as a nemesis? That whenever I see her in the office or her phone number pops up on my phone, I feel the cold stone of dread in the pit of my stomach? Why the hell would I want to talk to you, if you only ever have negative things to say? And not even negative things about my teaching (which neither she nor any of the other faculty have ever come to watch), but rather these piddling, idiotic, bureaucratic details which I see as little more than things to make my life more difficult. Anyway...

She called me, and - par for the course - immediately launched into what she had a "problem" with... which was, of course, the scheduling.

"You are supposed to give the students 32 hours of lecture. If you do this, you'll only be giving them 30."

"Are you saying, then," I replied, already a bit incensed, "that I should not have given them a midterm test during class? That cut into the lecture time as well. By this definition, I've already failed, since the midterm took up about 2 class hours."

"That was different," she said, sounding surprised that I'd react this way. "We set up a finals time for you to give the test."

"What is the functional difference between giving a mid-term test during a class period, and giving a finals test during a class period, other than the names 'mid-term,' and 'final?'"

There was a slight pause, she had not anticipated this tact. She said something, which I cannot recall at the moment, since by this point my face was beginning to redden. Regardless, it was something about this scheduling being a problem.

"Where is the problem?" I asked, "Who has the problem? The teacher has no problem with this schedule, the students have not problem with this schedule. Where is the problem?"

"I showed you the finals schedule earlier. If you had a problem wit the layout, you should have asked me to change it."

"I had no idea it was changeable." I said, face getting a little more red, "As far as I knew, the schedule was already set. No one said anything about being able to change it."

"On monday, maybe Wang Dan (her superior) should discuss this with you."

"Will she say the same thing you're saying right now?"

"Yes."

"Then why waste her and my time? Don't bother."

Later on she texted me saying she'd look into trying to make the test earlier in the schedule... I'm not holding my breath on that one, though.

The call ended somewhat tersely. I think what angered me the most was that thing whole argument had happened because I had momentarily forgotten the Law which I normally hold above all others: "It is far easier to obtain forgiveness, than permission." It wasn't that someone really cared - hell, no one above Xiaoxian even knew about it - it was that I'd made the mistake in telling her my plan. Had I just kept my mouth shut, there would be no issue. But in trying to be upfront and honest about a change I was wanting to make, I got smacked down for no other reason than it was out of line with some obscure, bureaucratic process. Let no good deed go unpunished, indeed.

So here I sit. And the options lay before me as such:
1) Simply carry through with my initial plan and deal with any "repercussions" they throw at me. I'm quitting, it's not like they can fire me. It's not like they can really do anything at all. Still, it'd be nice to go out on a good note.

2) Obey. Needlessly wait an extra three weeks to give the test, which will almost certainly delay my departure, since I can't do all the paperwork/grades until the testing is done. This option is so against my mind that I'm inclined to rule it out entirely. Still, there it is.

3) Take a deep breath and hopehopehope that somehow she can rearrange the schedule to something more suitable. Ha.

4) Pay lip service. Give the test on the last day, but then hold some kind of meeting with the students on the 17th. This seems like a good plan, except they're planning on giving me some kind of "helper" since their schedule has me giving all 4 classes the test simultaneously, in 2 separate rooms. How would I convince them that I don't need the "helper" or the second room?

In closing, I'd just like to point out that all of this is little more than venting. I'm not expecting a great deal of help, or sympathy. It's just a big frustration right at the end when I'm busy doing a lot of other things, and trying to cope without having a great deal of access to a computer (I'm holding Nancy's hostage at the moment). Did I mention I had to rewrite both of my finals in about 3 days because my computer died the day I was planing on sending them to Xiaoxian. She then had the gall to insinuate I was "stalling." I made my displeasure at that insinuation clearly known. One way or another, I've got less than a month to go...

And it can't go by fast enough.

(CS)WC Out.

We drink from the river

Friday, May 8, 2009

Leading with their Dick

"The idea that we ought to moderate basically means we ought to fundamentally change our philosophy. I for one am not prepared to do that, and I think most of us aren’t."

This lovely little gem was said by former Vice-Torturer in Chief, the Dark Lord of the Triple Bypass, Darth Dick. He snarled this to a conservative talk-radio show (though not Limbaugh, surprisingly) a few days ago.

I wanted to bring it up because it seems to underscore the mentality of Republicans right now. That is to say, in the wake of a crippling defeat, and after months of useless navel-gazing and embittered words toward their vanquishers, this is what they've come up with as a solution. Rather changing with the time, updating their value system, and - dare I say it? - evolving, many senior party members (and, lest we forget, their legions of rabid cultists) have decided their best option is to circle the ideological wagons, and cull the impure from their ranks.

"We're excluding the young, minorities, environmentalists, pro-choice — the list goes on," says Olympia Snowe of Maine, one of two moderate Republicans left in the Senate after Pennsylvania defector Arlen Specter's switch. "Ideological purity is not the ticket to the promised land." And yet, this is exactly what many embattled Republicans seem to be advocating now. Rather than think gee, the American people seem to have told us something last November... maybe we should adjust accordingly... they have double-downed on the philosophy of the last eight years - up to and including a vigorous, and ludicrous defense of torturing people "if it works" - in the near- absurd hope that we'll all suddenly agree with it.

Of course, the first (or maybe second, I forget) rule of battle is, "never interrupt your opponent while he's making a mistake." And I certainly don't mean to do so. If the Republicans want to tie their own shoelaces together, I say "by all means, go ahead."

So go ahead, Republicans, keep letting Cheney, Limbaugh, Coulter, and O'Reilly define your positions for you. Keep the mentality that there's "real Americans" and "fake Americans." Keep out the moderates, and then say "good riddance" when they abandon your sinking ship. Pander to the extreme religious Right. Continue to introduce legislation that - in true Kindergarten tantrum style - attempts to rename the Democratic Party the "Democratic Socialist Party." Continue to use inflamatory hyperbole in the face of rational debate. And by all means, continue to be a uselessly obstructionist party doing everything in their power to hinder the government in a time of crisis.

Let's see how that works out for you.

the night that falls all around us

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Belchtastic

I know I haven't posted here for a long time... as usual, both apathy and work-related fatigue can be traced as the source causes.

I just finished giving my midterms (a little late, yes, but better late than never) and they went well. So far the grades are coming back right where I want them. Only a few A's, and the only failures are those who inexplicably missed entire sections. We'll see if that holds up for the next 2 classes...

As of recently my GI tract as a whole has instigated a small-scale rebellion. The most bothersome details... well, I won't discuss them... but there's also waking up in the morning and immediately letting out a huge burp. And the burping all day. I think it's indigestion or something. No pain, just bloating and, well... expulsions of the gaseous variety. Nancy says she can buy a medicine for that... somehow I'm not surprised... we'll see how that goes...

I recently realized that I only have a bit more than a month left here, at least of this school year. Where has the time gone!? It certainly doesn't feel like that much time has passed. Nevertheless, it will be nice to finish out and see my peeps again back home. :)

Aaron and I were talking the other day on our ritualistic weekly walk to the university KFC... and we agreed that it was a very nice feeling to be a teacher here. I'll elaborate a bit: thinking back to the beginning of our first semester until now, there is a real, noticeable difference - positive, obviously - in our students' language skills. Though certainly not our doing alone, we certainly helped in that progress. It's nice to see... or rather, hear the fruits of our labors in action. Makes you feel good about what you're doing for sure.

Alright, that's all to report for now. I've got more burping to accomplish...

(CS)WC Out.

I forgot my pen