Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Unsinkable: The Price of Harmony in the PRC

It was just over a year ago that the newest and shiniest of Shanghai’s sprawling 400+km Metro system had its limited opening to passengers. Line 10 was hailed as a technological leap forward in mass-transit: fully automated (able to be operated without human drivers even!), with the latest in security and safety features... and most importantly, German-designed. It was virtually impossible to malfunction, much less crash. Even direct human error would be overridden by the sophisticated computers and tracking systems in place. I was thrilled because, at the time, my family and I were living less than a block away from one of the Line 10 stations. It was a huge convenience, since the next-closest Metro line was a 20-minute walk.

In late September, two trains on Line 10 collided. The crash left at least than 271 people injured, about 20 critically. Fortunately, as yet, no one is reported as having died. I’ve long since stopped using Line 10 at all, since having moved to a different district of the city, and yet the implications – and tacit fear – hit me all the same. I could well have been riding that train… and further, who’s to say the trains I do ride might not be at risk of a similar or worse accident? More than anything, though, I simply shake my head and sigh as this latest near-tragic chapter of China’s breakneck modernization unfolds. And many Chinese, much like me, see this as a horrifying – but unsurprising – development… the cost of growth, perhaps.



This is hardly, after all, a singular occurrence. In some ways – too many ways - it rings of “déjà vu all over again.” Just two months ago – in an incident that again hit far too close to home for my comfort – a two high-speed trains on the Shanghai-Wenzhou railway collided amid a thunderstorm, injuring hundreds and killing an official “40” people (though there is widespread belief that the real fatality count will never be released). This occurred less than a week before my wife and child were planning to take that very train line down to her hometown, with me following a few days later. They ended up taking a plane, while I gulped and boarded the train by myself… a thankfully completely uneventful trip to and from.



Still, that’s pretty small comfort. I arrived in China in the immediate aftermath of the infamous melamine-milk scandal of 2008, read about the near-completed apartment complex which collapsed on a man due to shoddy construction materials, watched on the news about another apartment complex going up in flames due to – you guessed it – shoddy, unlicensed renovations, read about bridges and half-finished freeways collapsing because of… well, you get the picture. Most recently (save for the Line 10 accident) I read the sickening reports of a “crackdown” on so-called “gutter oil.” This is used cooking oil fished from gutters, sewers, drains, et al, illegally “processed” to “clean” it, and then sold to restaurants at rock-bottom prices (gee, wonder why). It’s estimated that perhaps one in ten businesses have used or are using gutter oil in some capacity. Yum.



My point is that cutting corners in ways that can lead to tragedy, sickness, and death is not just some one-off for China – it’s business as usual; a product of both corrupt business practices, and a corrupt bureaucracy of governance… but more than anything widespread societal acceptance that “this is normal.” It is simply understood that these sorts of things are the cost of advancement, of modernization. Of course, there is public backlash whenever anything goes wrong. The guilty (or perceived guilty) parties are paraded forth to deliver Jerry Falwell-esque “I have sinned” repentance speeches, and then “justice” is doled out. Be it merely losing their job or prison, or execution at a speed that would make even a Texan’s head spin, the case is closed and everyone else keeps right on fishing for gutter oil.

Why is this? Why is there no discernable shift in attitudes when these things crop up? I’ve already mentioned the cultural shrug-off of it being “the cost of progress,” but I think it’s more than that. In part, I’d say it has to do with the opaque implacability of the CCP – at virtually every level. Be it the local police force, or the People’s Congress, there is no Chinese C-SPAN (or Daily Show to help parse it) monitoring and recording what happens (or doesn’t happen) in those glorious and harmonious halls. The populace at large simply does not know, and has no way of knowing what their government is doing… and consequentially has long ago given up caring. This is completely by design.

The government of the PRC seems to have found a winning combination – the holy grail of a techno-auto-bureaucratic regime. The recipe for one-party success has deceptively few steps, but appears to be surprisingly difficult to actually balance (see: Syria, Egypt, Tunisia, Libya, et al).

Step 1) Grow the economy, always. People without jobs are people planning insurrection. As long as most of the people feel their lives are better this year than last year, and their children are doing better than their parents, they will not want to rock that boat. Under no circumstances should the economy be allowed to contract. In the event of a global financial meltdown, which would shutter huge swaths of your export and manufacturing-driven economy, force the banks to give huge loans to keep those industries afloat. Oh, that leads me to…



Step 2) Control the finances. The banks are state-owned, or at the very least a joint-venture with the govt. When Beijing says start shelling out the bucks, they don’t demure and whine about profit margins… they salute and say “How much, sir?” This works even better if…

Step 2.5) Don’t block the media, be the media. At first glance – and to many Chinese, their only view ever – China doesn’t censor. They’ve got news, they report bad things that happen, conduct interviews, and there are multiple news channels and internet outlets with different reports. There are newspapers that report more conservatively than others, and some that report things at the borders of tolerability. They’ve even got a Facebook clone (Renren) and a Twitter clone (Weibo). And they’re all owned, operated, and policed by – you guessed it – the gub’ment.



Step 3) What You Can’t Control, Remove. – The title of the previous step is misleading… China censors… big time. There is an entire massive industry surrounding the manipulation and denial of information. From the vast and seemingly-random swaths of the internet blockaded by the Great Firewall, to web forum/blog “Harmonizers” empowered to moderate, change, or straight up delete posts deemed “unharmonious” (read: potentially anti-Beijing/Party), to the semi-infamous “Fifty-Cent Party” which has nothing to do with promoting the thug life of Curtis James Jackson III, and everything to do with acting as a paid army of commentators who’s job it is to steer online discussion into government-friendly territory, and are paid by the post. You can even find their usually ham-fisted attempts to do the same in English any time an article relating to China appears on Time or CNN. Fortunately they’re pretty easy to spot as their arguments consist overwhelmingly of misspelled hyper-patriotic Chinglish to the tune of “y u westrenrs no like harmonious China? Leave glorious PRC alone evil white guizi!”



Back when the so-called Arab Spring was just gaining steam in Tunisia and Egypt, and when Ghadaffi was still sporting ridiculous floral print dresses in Libya, some Chinese netizens started calling for a similar protest movement in China, dubbing it a “Jasmine Revolution.” They called for large-scale gatherings in cities all over the country, in public places a la Tahrir Square. Naturally the CPC took a measured, appropriate response of A) deleting all mention of the protests, B) arresting anyone who showed up to the designated protest area… even though it was a KFC (and Chinese people love KFC), and C) completely blocking the term “jasmine” from the internet. That’s right – in a country where jasmine is a popular tea, a pretty flower, and the English name of every fifth girl – they eradicated the word based on the postings of about a half-dozen dissidents.

And finally, Step 4) Turn official corruption into a game of Russian roulette – Official corruption is a redundancy in the PRC. Forget what you think you know about Rod Blagojevich or Bernie Madoff… they’re small fries, amateurs. The entire Chinese economic machine is oiled with the grease of back-room dealings, black market trade, mafia money, and cutting every conceivable corner while paying the official in charge of oversight to take a 4-month bathroom break. As I mentioned before, it’s long past the point of a running joke… it’s just too blasé to be funny or interesting to most people anymore. It is the “take my wife…please!” of China. So in a system powered entirely by the unholy combination of Ayn Rand’s wet dream and The Godfather Pts. 1 & 2 (seriously, screw part 3), how can the government maintain the façade of accountability and, y’know, not being essentially a national-scale Triad organization… without grinding their economy to a screeching halt (remember Step 1, after all)?

Simple! Just turn the act of being a government official, tycoon, or wealthy person in general into a big lottery: everyone gets to make as much free black-market money as they can, become as corrupt and unaccountable as possible… and when something goes wrong, the guy who pulls the short straw gets shot and his family stripped of everything it every owned. In this instance, “pulling the short straw” means not having enough connections and strings to pull to buck the blame onto someone else, or crossing someone more important than you. And instead of being fitted for a pair of concrete shoes, or a “leave the gun, take the cannoli” drive out to the countryside, the poor Luca Brasi in question is paraded through the legal system as an embodiment of “justice” and “anticorruption” before being taken behind a chemical shed and shot. Oh, and then his family is sent a bill for the bullet. Seriously.



A good friend of mine and I recently got together at one of the only places in Shanghai that brews anything other that Budweiser-clone pilsner, somewhere between the second and fourth pitcher of Imperial Stout our conversation turned to this very topic. He’s Chinese and studied law in college in hopes of becoming a policeman, and worked in a government office for a while before deciding that wasn’t his thing. His girlfriend is an intern at a large Shanghai legal firm. Suffice it to say, what he has to say on the topic is something worth taking with more than a grain of salt. I’m paraphrasing, but in essence he said the majority of legal work, deals, and trials have almost nothing to do with case law, precedent, or evidence… but on who you know, and your (the lawyer/firm’s) relationship with the judge presiding. Though he and his girlfriend have enough firsthand knowledge to make a pretty convincing case by themselves, he went further and told me this wasn’t just the de facto situation, but what he was actually taught in school. I have to imagine the curriculum looked something like:
Chinese Law 101: It Isn’t What You Know, It’s Who You Know
Legal Ethics 215: LOL… C’mon, Seriously Now…
Trial Law 347: How Schmoozing the Judge Can Get You Acquittals/Convictions
Trial Law 401: Evidence Suppression and You


Now this is the part where I’m supposed to have some sort of grandiose solution to this list of issues: A Grand Unified Theory of Fixology. Well, I don’t… no one does. That is also by design. I’m an outsider looking in, simply blinking rapidly and marveling at the sheer enormity of the system in place and – for better and for worse – its own complex system for self-preservation. It’s a fascinating organism, the PRC: a society and government body based on the bones of a Confucian/Imperial mix of meritocracy and patronage, the organs of a Soviet/Maoist-style autocracy, and the muscles of Den Xiaoping’s “socialist market economy,” and all that under the thin, transparent skin of a “Republic.” While the rest of the Soviet bloc have long since crumbled to dust, the PRC keeps chugging along, using its own peculiar ability to adapt with the times to remain relevant and in power. And me? I’m just, for the time being, along for the ride, enjoying the benefits of being somewhere between a panda and a space alien in terms of coolness, and making sure to only buy my kid formula that’s been imported from the West. No melamine in my son’s diet, thanks.




(CS) TAW Out.

Saturday, July 23, 2011

Musings of a Saturday Evening

July winds down towards its conclusion, and – save for the hellacious heat/humidity combo – it scarcely seems summer’s almost come and gone already. There was, not too terribly long ago, a drastic schedule change between summer, and those other three forgettable seasons. Now, - again, save for the mercury levels that would have Beelzebub sweating – it’s all just one relatively undifferentiated week from another.

It was yesterday that I officially renewed my contract with Longman Schools in Shanghai (I’ve been advised not to use "re-signing", as all too often I omit the hyphen, and it looks like I’m quitting). I’d made an appointment for 1:00, and soon found that apparently so had everyone else in the company. Shuffled from one office to another, and then shunted out of that because some hypersensitive Chinese teacher found my silent contract-signing too disturbing for her lilac of a student, it took a good 45 minutes to complete what would have, under normal circumstances, taken 15, maybe 20.

It’s the rare occasion that I’m exposed to other campuses. I’ve managed to carve an extremely insular niche at my own Chunshen campus, and consequentially am only occasionally exposed to the “rest” of the company. So infrequent is it that it can become all-too-easy to forget why I’ve spent the last two years doing so. This was a reminder. These people are crazy, and I’m lucky enough to have shielded myself from the majority of their nuttiness.

Still, I’ve come to the tentative decision that this may well be our last year in China (this is not, by the way, a unilateral decision). As accustomed as I’ve become to the country, there’s still a large piece of me that longs to return. This is assuming, of course, that there will be anything more than a smoking ruin to return to. That’s in large part why I signed on for another year. My intent is to try to ride this whole suicidal populist groundswell out from a safe distance. If in the next week or two the whole thing willfully goes to shit, well, viva la China. If somehow this whole default catastrophuck blows over, then homecoming is a very real option.

I’ve managed to complete my preliminary iteration of my Apples to Apples clone, and now just need to find the time to get it printed on the company’s dime. I’ve not done a page could, but 20+ full color would not be surprising, potentially double-sided… and then there’s lamination to consider. Makes me thankful I can write this off as a company expense.


(CS) TAW Out.

I'm glad I didn't know the way it all would end

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Lions, and Contracts, and Beers! Oh my!

I'm in the process of "feeling out" the new MacOS - Lion... I think I'll call mine Mufasa!...Oooooohhhhhh... Do it again! Mu-Fa-Saaaa!! So far it's quite nice, and quite a good deal at $29.99. There's still a few features to get used to, though. The biggest on is the trackpad... they've decided to reverse it... so now down is up and up is down. It fits with their iPad-ization of the OS, but it's still a little disorienting. I'm still occasionally wondering why the hell the page won't scroll down... and then realize it's because I'm pushing the wrong way. Doh.

I've just concluded my latest round of contract negotiations. Though I'd been pursuing the idea of striking out on my own, it turns out it wasn't as simple as all that. Due to certain less-than-reputable individuals scamming customers and fleeing the country, the barrier to enter into the English business has increased dramatically. On a single salary, with a little guy, it's just not feasible at the moment to try to lay down all that groundwork.

So instead, Pearson and I hammered out a new deal... I got a 15-20% raise, depending on the numbers used (it's complicated), and I essentially will just keep on keeping on. We'll be moving out of Nancy's uncle's apartment in August, and so we're in the beginning stages of looking for a "new pad." I've made it clear what I require from any potential apartment:
1) rent at or below 4000/month... it can take some effort and negotiation, but it's feasible...
2) preferably at or south of Xujiahui... I wanna be close enough to work...
3) north of Shanghai South Station... but not so far from city center...
4) As close to Line 1 Metro as possible... no more 20 minute walks to and from the subway, tyvm.

In other news, I've been drawn into a family semi(not really)-competitive "cookoff" and have, as a consequence, decided to "up my game," both in terms of food I'm making, and the beers with which to wash it down. As a result, I've been discovering some of the remarkably delicious brews available to those willing to track them down in Shanghai :) It's not all Tsingtao and Suntory, after all!

(CS) TAW Out.

Hello again, friend of a friend

Monday, June 13, 2011

The Plum Rain Season

Lasting from early/mid-June through the middle of July, the so-called "Plum Rainy Season" is Shanghai's version of monsoon season. Why do they call it Plum Rain? Well, two reasons: first, because typically plums ripen in late July, right after the conclusion of these rains... and secondly, it sounds much more pleasant than the other option, the Fungus Rain Season (plum and fungus are phonetic homonyms).

The season itself is marked by wet, warm rain in grey, dull days, interspersed with witheringly hot and humid jaunts into the maw of Hell itself. Fungus rain season starts to sound more and more accurate, right?

In other news, we've been trying to send some money across the Pacific to my US account so as to pay down my credit card there. And believe you me, it's no simple, quick task. We have the money set aside, my account number, the bank's SWIFT number, will probably need my passport... ugh... I think it might be easier to affix a roll of bills to a carrier pigeon and hope for the best.

小C now has 4 teeth growing in (!), and we recently bought an "ergo gym" for him... which is a fancy way of saying a walker with lights and sounds. So far, he's more interested in trying to climb over/eat the thing that walk with it... but it's still cool to see him bipedal (with significant assistance from mommy/daddy). His "vocabulary" continues to expand and mutate. Though still monosyllabic babble, it's come to include not only his initial "doo doo doo" and "da da da," but now "ba ba" and even "moo moo moo." One of these days we'll get him to say "mama" and make Nancy happy ;D

(CS) TAW Out.

Its contents watched by Sycorax

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Thoughts While Watching Chinese TV....

I've been watching a bit more Chinese TV as of late (both because I'm trying to spend more time with Nancy/listening to Chinese... and I'm just about out of new shows to download right now). In spite of the impossibly high language barrier to entry, enjoyment can be found by even a language-deaf foreigner like me... mostly by MST3K'ing these shows to myself as I watch them. And believe me, specifics of the dialogues aside, there's plenty to mock about Chinese TV...

Commercials
There's just so much to love/give you an aneurysm about Chinese commercials. Chalk it up to my jaded, savvy American mind, but they're just ridiculous. They promise ridiculous things, and paint ridiculous scenarios. They're American commercials before people realized that commercials are total BS.

Toothpaste is not only cause to throw a pool party, but turns you into a retarded manga cartoon. Every single product, including diarrhea medicine has its own cutesy, cartoon spokesthing. Beer still has the power to grant wishes... just by pouring it.

Not to mention that apparently somewhere along the chain of command, someone has made the decision that it's best to buy as many time slots as is humanly possible. In any one commercial break there are no less than 3 repeats of the exact same commercial advertising laxative tea to the elderly. When I go on the subway, no lie, every 3 and a half minutes comes on a commercial featuring a woman riding a donkey (it sounds kinkier than it is), and advertising for Ganji, an EBay clone shopping site. Added to that is the fact that each time she starts the commercial by screaming the name of the company as loud as possible. It's is because of Ganji that I bought a new pair of headphones... but unfortunately for them, not from them.

Oh yeah. And every. God. Damned. Thing. Rhymes.
Everything
Forever
And ever
Amen.

Reality Shows
China seems obsessed with reality shows... but not as we know them. It's not a Survivor clone, nor Who Wants to Be a Millionaire that seems to be everywhere (though they do exist)... but rather these banal, boring versions of Jerry Springer or the Maury Povich show.

Imagine Jerry Springer if there were no transvestite baby-daddies, cross-dressing trucker hookers, or midget porn stars. Now imagine That Jerry's final thought was the entire second half of the show, and was in fact a lecture complete with podium to the audience about whatever evil happened to be the topic of the day (today's appears to be "not beating your gal on the side who's mother of your 3 illegitimate children"). And imagine Jerry isn't Jerry, but a portly, middle-aged Chinese woman with a voice like raking gravel and a face that makes you think Mao didn't look so bad. Sternly lecturing her audience and everyone else. How does this get a show?!

Other than that, there are the near ubiquitous dating shows. Great, thinks you, Joe McForeignviewer, something along the lines of Blind Date or, hell, even Next. Nope. Instead, men are brought out one by one like the condemned brought before the firing squad... the firing squad being an extremely intimidating ring of potential mothers in law (keep in mind, at this point and through the course of the entire program there is neither hide nor hair of any of the actual prospective women to date... just the grim, stony mothers. To give these sacrificial male lambs some sliver of hope, they are presented with a montage of the photos of the women they'll probably never meet). These gargoyles then commence with what is, in effect, a hostile interrogation - aided by several separate judges and a camera crew picking apart the guy's life. Each time a mother decides that her daughter's too good for the guy, she get a chance to personally berate what she thinks are his shortcomings.

The only reason that a show as punishingly brutal as this has survived more than 3 episodes, I'm sure, is that there are just so many desperate men in China willing to walk barefoot over broken glass, arm wrestle a gorilla, or eat live spiders for a chance with a girl. My question is: Why don't they make a show about that instead?! I'd be thrilled to watch desperate guys be tasked with a castrating an unrestrained tiger for a date with a girl... but watching mothers grill him? Pass.

(CS) TAW Out.

a prison with an intellect

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Time lost and futures yet to come

Where has the time gone?

That's a question, I'm sure, I'll be asking more and more frequently in the years to come... but I never intended to leave this blog sit untended for 6 months. Wait, on second thought, I do know where the time has gone... into that little poop-machine I affectionately call "wee one."

Nevertheless, I left us on a cliffhanger... I promised a part two, and failed to deliver.

But let's just let bygones be bygones, and have a fresh start, no?

小c is pushing 9 months (!), Nancy's all healed, and continues to push toward her pre-preggers figure - not at my urging, certainly (more her sisters', I'm sure)... but I'm not complaining, either.

In spite of the whirls and rush of the day to day - job, wife, kid, and all those other little things that continue to find their way into the "inbox" of life - I find myself more and more frequently (and in many ways forced) to think about the future, both medium and long term.

My contract with Longman expires in August. I will have completed 2 years there at that time, and will, in fact, be among the longest-working teachers in the company. I learned the other day from my friend and former coworker Leon that I am in fact that last person from my "crop" of trainees who's still working there.

That's not surprising, though. Most people come as the same person I was when I went to Wenzhou: coming for the experience of China, and having a way to pay the bills while they do. Some even take it a step further: they work long enough for their year-long work visa to get pasted on their passport, and then they bugger off for parts unknown.

I'm reasonably sure that I'll be getting an email soon-ish, inquiring as to my plans after this contract is up, and offering a new year-long gig. Of course, there is the outside chance that they'll thank me for my time and show me the door... but given my length of employment, track record, and that they considered me in high enough standing to give me a "Star Teacher" award at last years annual company dinner, I'd be pretty surprised.

So what then? Certainly working for this company has been stable, reasonable work, with relatively few headaches, or employers taking all the cash and fleeing the country. So that's a plus.

If I were to accept another contract, I'd have a few specific things I'd want out of it...
1) a change of campus... for more than one reason. The travel distance, the absurdly out of the way location, the coworker I'd like to strangle about half the time.
2) a pay increase, of the substantial variety. High teens, at least.
3) a trained polar bear to ride + saddle. (Alright, I'm willing to compromise on that last one, the saddle might be a bit much)

The thing behind Door No. 2... is considerably more of a, shall we say, challenge. And that is the idea of returning to Wenzhou to work part-time, while also private-teaching and building a student base to open my own school. I am, after all, eminently qualified... and I have the Star Teacher Award to prove it (even though the name makes it sound like someone a teacher should be giving to a 3rd grader). It could also be done here in Shanghai, but that seems considerably more difficult...

Anyway, I shall continue to ponder these and other mysteries of the universe.... in between nap time, burpings, and diaper changes.

(CS) TAW Out.
send shivers down my spine